Connections

One of the things that concerned me when we decided to move to Australia was that I would struggle to make friends, and feel lonely. I remember discussing these concerns with my husband and saying, “You’ll be at work and meeting loads of people, and I’ll just be with the children…” My husband was upbeat about my ability to make new friends but talking to him didn’t convince me.

It was other mums, mostly of older children, that talked the most sense. I remember a friend, who has children a few years older than mine, saying that once your children attend regular day care or school, or go to the same weekly activities, they’ll make friends. This means that mums get to know each other and friendships develop. What she said made sense, but when we relocated to Aus I was still at the “I’ll believe it when I see it” stage.

We’ve been living in the same suburb in Australia for seven months. During this short period of time we’ve made some great friends. We have developed more friendships and local connections here in seven months than we did in the four years we spent living at the same address in London.

My friend back in the UK was right when she said that as your children get older, friendships with other parents prosper. We can thank the children for the majority of the friendships we’ve made here. We should also thank the Aussie way of life.

Being out and about all the time, in playgrounds, parks, and at the beach means you regularly bump into the same people. The fact that we’re leading such an outdoor life has helped our community connections develop. The modern Australian population is largely made up of immigrants, and Australians love to travel. This means that the people we meet tend to have an understanding of what we’re going through making a new home down under, and are very supportive.

Children can make or break a relationship

Having said that it’s easy to make friends in Australia, the process is not without its pitfalls. Meeting people through the children means that friendships are initially based on half finished sentences and interrupted conversations. Handling your children’s difficult behaviour, and feeling comfortable that your friends are dealing with their own, is a challenge that can make or break a relationship.

Our youngest has been through some very normal but challenging stages since being here and I’ve come home from outings with new friends wondering if they’ll ever want to see us again. I’ve had nothing but support though – for that I’m very grateful.

Be brave

If you’re about to leave home to relocate to Australia and are worried about making new friends, I hope this article helps you feel a little braver. I’ve been amazed by how easily we’ve met people and settled into the local community.

I don’t think our experiences are unique – if you have experiences to share please do so in the comments below. If you’ve just arrived please read New to Aus? You’re not alone and Meeting mums – playgrounds, playgroups and local events for additional inspiration.